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I Called My Boyfriend’s Girlfriend and I’m Not Sorry About It

Photographer: Sheila GimNo Restrictions: Editorial and internal use approved. OK for Native and co-branded use.

Dear girlfriend,

My relationship together with your boyfriend began when he proclaimed, “I have to break up with my girlfriend tonight.”

And my response was, “And I’m filing for divorce. So there’s that.”

We exchanged numbers and he texted me the following afternoon, assuring me that issues between you had been over. Apparently, they weren’t.

Your boyfriend and I had been pleasant however by no means pals. We had been attracted to one another and there was a bit of sport we preferred to play the place we may very well be as snarky and sarcastic as we might, simply so we each knew the opposite was . Our type of flirting, I guess. We noticed one another regularly due to our skilled connection, however we did not cross the road as a result of we weren’t single on the identical time. Until we had been. Or so I thought.

I was searching for you your complete time he and I had been collectively as a result of, in my coronary heart, I knew you had been nonetheless round. When he would disappear for hours on finish after a day-long texting spree, I knew he was with you. When I would have horrible anxiety attacks as a result of I felt like one thing was unsuitable, I knew he was with you. When I stunned him one evening on the prepare station together with his favourite espresso in hopes of a snuggle session – and he informed me (albeit sweetly) to go dwelling – I knew he had plans with you. I truly requested him about you one evening after a very uneasy feeling and he mentioned it was finished way back and I was simply insecure. He made me feel like I was nuts however deep down, I knew I wasn’t.

It took awhile and a stroke of luck, however I lastly discovered you. And when I noticed him in your Facebook profile photograph, it was the primary time I ever felt the emotion of rage. I was finished with him earlier than making it any additional down the web page, actually texting, “You are a liar. Do not ever talk to me again. Delete me from your phone and your life,” to him proper at that second.

I known as you as a result of if it had been me in that place, I would have wished to know earlier than it was too late.

And then I scrolled down. I noticed the pictures you posted with captions about how a lot you liked him. You did not know that he was in my bed the evening earlier than, telling me he beloved me (one thing that I by no means mentioned again to him). I noticed the feedback your mates made about what a great man he was and what a phenomenal couple you made. I noticed him smiling subsequent to you and your children, your stunning boys who regarded as much as this man.

That’s when I made the choice to name you.

I known as you since you had been his girlfriend, not his spouse. If you had been his spouse, the thought would have by no means crossed my thoughts. Girlfriends arguably have extra of a alternative, though it isn’t all the time a simple alternative. But wives – generally they do not have a alternative, or at the very least it could possibly really feel that method. If they do, it is usually lined with so many hardships that generally staying can really feel simpler, and then the emotions of insecurity and resentment are theirs to maintain for years to come back.

I known as you as a result of if it had been me in that place, I would have wished to know earlier than it was too late. I would have wished to know if the person I was planning to make a life with was truthful to me. I would have wished to know if he would have been a sensible stepfather and a great position mannequin to my kids, if I had any. I would have wished to get tested for an STI. I would have wished the selection to go away or to remain and I would have wished to make it alone accord.

I know I harm you. I know I shocked you. I know I most likely shattered your world that evening, regardless that we each know you stayed just a few extra months earlier than it was over.

I am no stranger to heartbreak, and I am constructive I introduced you some. There are some instances I really feel badly about it and assume that I ought to have simply left you alone, in ignorance, and let you’ve the person you liked. But, most instances, I really feel like I did the precise factor as a result of, let’s face it – you deserve a person who appears to be like at you on a regular basis like you’re the solely lady he desires to be with, who values you, and who loves you sufficient to be sincere with you.

I did it since you deserve actual, true, love. And I hope you discover it, if you have not already.

With love and hope for the longer term,
Your ex-boyfriend’s ex-girlfriend

Image Source: Primetweets Photography / Sheila Gim

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